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Will I be loved or will I be alone? Intimacy vs Isolation

If you’ve ever experienced the fear of being single, you’re not alone. Many people are eager for a committed, fulfilling long-term partnerships, but struggle to find the right person which can cause worry and anxiety. This article will cover a relevant social development theory by Erik Erikson and some tips on dealing with the search for a partner.

Erik Erikson’s Theory

People aged between 19- 40 go through a stage called Intimacy vs. Isolation in which they explore relationships with others and share themselves intimately. For many they will want to create a relationship with another person, for others they will avoid engaging relationships and want to be isolated. This psychoanalytic theory of psycho-social development by Erik Erikson is called Intimacy Vs Isolation, read more on BetterHelp.

If you’re asking yourself “Will I every be loved and intimate with another person?” and you want the answer to be yes, here are some tips that could help you.

Give people a chance.

It is important to give other people a chance to get to know them better. Be open to dates, meeting people and trying a different approach. If you are looking to find the perfect person to start dating, this might never happen, nobody is perfect. The aim is find someone that will love you equally despite flaws and imperfections. Additionally, try not to set unrealistic expectations for a relationship, having a high standard is good but not too high so nobody can reach it.

Instead of waiting of that person that might not exist, open yourself up to others, you might feel a connection you didn’t think you could have.


Finding the time to socialize and meet new people can be extremely challenging if you have a busy schedule. Try to be mindful that in order to meet your potential partner you need to increase your chances by socializing with others. It is important to have a good work life balance, try and free up your schedule at least once per week to meet with others.

Socializing is not about posting your life on social media to get likes and comments, this opens yourself up to self-doubt etc. Spend less time on social media and more time with others.

Work on Self-Improvement

It is important to change with age, work on some different aspects in your lifestyle such as appearance and improve them to the best of your abilities. For those that rely on others to be happy then this is a good time to remain single and improve on that. Another areas of focus on is to love yourself and think positive about who you are. Self-improvement will not only help you find a potential partner but will also help you in life generally.

Enjoy Being Single

Don’t worry about being single, enjoy it. Meet new people, spend time with family and friends and do things that make you happy and content. Travel to new destinations, take up new hobbies and enjoy being by yourself. Be content with yourself whilst actively looking for a partner, this can remove any doubts about the future you have.

Whether you are anxious about finding a partner or not so much, be sure to enjoy the journey and always aim to self-improve.

Please leave a comment below if we have missed anything that should be included.