Take Our Bad Ass Quiz
Choose your best answer and tally your points:
1.) In my life, I have saved ____lives
A) 0 (0 pts.)
B) 1 (5 pts.)
C) 2 (10 pts.)
D) 3 or more (20 pts.)
2.) In my DVD collection, you will find a copy of:
A) The Notebook (0 pts.)
B) Predator (10 pts.)
C) Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist (0 pts.)
D) Over the Hedge (0 pts.)
3.) I work, or have worked as a:
A) Firefighter (10 pts.)
B) Ballerina Instructor (0 pts.)
C) Juvenile Detention Officer (5 pts.)
D) I have never worked (0 pts.)
4.) My maximum bench press is:
A) 100 lbs. (5 pts.)
B) 200 lbs. (5 pts.)
C) Over 200 lbs. (10 pts.)
D) I do Pilates (0 pts.)
5.) In my life, I have gotten into fistfights:
A) Never (0 pts.)
B) 1 time (5 pts.)
C) 2 times (5 pts.)
D) 3 or more times (10 pts.)
6.) Of all my fights, I won:
A) All of them (10 pts.)
B) None of them (0 pts.)
C) Half of them (5 pts.)
D) By fighting dirty (0 pts.)
7.) My favorite color is:
A) Black (10 pts.)
B) White (5 pts.)
C) Blue (5 pts.)
D) Chartreuse (0 pts.)
8.) In my music collection, you will find:
A) Johnny Cash (10 pts.)
B) Justin Bieber (0 pts.)
C) Stone Temple Pilots (5 pts.)
D) Soundtrack to Grease (-5 pts.)
9.) In the club, you will find me dancing:
A) Never (10 pts.)
B) Every chance I get (0 pts.)
C) When a female makes me (5 pts.)
D) On a pole, in a cage or atop the bar (-5 pts)
10.) My drink of choice consists of:
A) Straight shots (10 pts.)
B) A mixed cocktail containing a low-calorie, organic fruit blend (-5 pts.)
C) Beer (5 pts.)
D) I don’t drink (0 pts.)
11.) My favorite foods include:
A) Hamburgers (10 pts.)
B) Tofu (0 pts.)
C) Chocolate-covered strawberries (-5 pts.)
D) I’m on a diet. I don’t eat. (0 pts.)
12.) If I start to go bald, I will fashion:
A) A comb-over (0 pts.)
B) A shaved head (10 pts.)
C) A toupee (0 pts.)
D) Wild ‘n crazy hats! (0 pts.)
13.) My opinion of casual sex is:
A) Have at it (10 pts.)
B) Hard to come by, but not for lack of trying (5 pts.)
C) Ok, responsibly (0 pts.)
D) Gross. I’m not a slut. (-5 pts.)
14.) I am, or was once a member of:
A) The military (10 pts.)
B) A gang (5 pts.)
C) My church choir (0 pts.)
D) Netflix (0 pts.)
15.) I have gotten a manicure:
A) Never in my life (10 pts.)
B) Once (5 pts.)
C) Two or more times (0 pts.)
D) Done so poorly I will never go back there again but don’t worry, I found a better place and get this– they’re even cheaper! (-5 pts)
16.) I would find it acceptable to get a massage from another man if:
A) The spa is out of female masseuses (0 pts.)
B) I am on ecstasy (0 pts.)
C) He is a physical therapist (5 pts.)
D) Never (10 pts.)
17.) I often engage in:
A) Sports (5 pts.)
B) Flirting with women (5 pts.)
C) Hand-to-hand combat (10 pts.)
D) Competitive knitting (0 pts.)
18.) The last time I wrote poetry:
A) Was for a school assignment (5 pts.)
B) I was a teenager (0 pts.)
C) Is never (10 pts.)
D) Was after I saw Bella choose Edward. Poor Jacob! (-5 pts.)
19.) If I were cast in an action movie, I would want to play:
A) The Hero (10 pts.)
B) The Villain (5 pts.)
C) The Sidekick (0 pts.)
D) The Love Interest (0 pts.)
20.) I like to read:
A) Romance novels (0 pts.)
B) Spy novels (5 pts.)
C) I don’t read (10 pts.)
D) Only when on the toilet (5 pts.)
21.) I take baths:
A) To relax (0 pts.)
B) Because I’m injured (5 pts.)
C) Never (10 pts.)
D) In soy milk (-5 pts.)
22.) I talk a lot:
A) About my prowess (0 pts.)
B) About my kids (0 pts.)
C) Never (10 pts.)
D) Only in a church confessional (5 pts.)
23.) My favorite sport is:
A) Basketball (5 pts.)
B) Football (10 pts.)
C) Baseball (5 pts.)
D) Synchronized swimming (0 pts.)
24.) I feel like I have to prove I am badass.
A) Never (10 pts.)
B) Always (0 pts.)
C) Sometimes (5 pts.)
D) To children and/or the weak (-5 pts.)
25.) I have ___ tattoos.
A) No (0 pts.)
B) 1 or 2 (5 pts.)
C) 3 or more (10 pts.)
D) Lower back (DO NOT CONTINUE QUIZ.)
26.) I am or was in prison:
A) Never (0 pts.)
B) For more than a month (5 pts.)
C) For unpaid parking tickets (0 pts.)
D) Right now (10 pts.)
27.) I have worn a dress:
A) Because my sister or relative made me (5 pts.)
B) For Halloween (0 pts.)
C) As a disguise (10 pts.)
D) That matches my earrings (-5 pts.)
28.) I smoke:
A) Cigarettes (5 pts.)
B) Cigars (10 pts.)
C) Nothing (0 pts.)
D) Crack-cocaine (-5 pts.)
29.) I love:
A) My mother (5 pts.)
B) My sister (5 pts.)
C) My wife/girlfriend (5 pts.)
D) Other peoples’ mothers, sisters, wives, and girlfriends (10 pts.)
30.) I have killed:
A) People who deserved it (10 pts.)
B) No one (0 pts.)
C) An audience, telling jokes (0 pts.)
D) A whole bottle of Aveeno Anti-Bacterial Moisturizer in one day (-5 pts.)
Total Point Rating:
60 – 50: You’re close to a bad ass, but instead of a ‘b’ with an ‘s’
55 – 150: You’re like Don Knotts, but with less testosterone.
155 – 285: Average, but you have your moments.
290 – 310: Jason Statham would follow your Tweets.
