This post was developed via a partnership with BetterHelp.
Men can express their anger in a variety of ways, but it’s common for them to use it to hide another, more vulnerable emotion. Despite the fact that anger can be beneficial, suppressing or avoiding it is not. One’s physical health and interpersonal relationships may suffer, as well as one’s mental health and substance abuse, which can result in suicidal thoughts or violent acts.
Anger is a natural emotion to go through.
Actually, it’s a bit unusual if you never do. Anger is a dreaded and unwelcome emotion for many guys. Some people have come to accept it as a normal part of their lives, and it may even feel like their personality is enraged at times.
When it’s permissible to be angry, it’s beneficial to do so in a controlled manner. Taking a breather, imagining a better outcome, or asserting oneself delicately are all examples of this. Personal and interpersonal issues may occur, though, if anger becomes a default state of mind. Anger management difficulties can escalate to abuse, violence, road rage, domestic and workplace conflicts, and much more if left unchecked.
How Men Utilize Anger as a Cover for Other Emotions
Men who have experienced adversity as a child, as an adult, or who have a mental health or substance abuse disease are more likely to have anger difficulties.
Displaced rage serves as a form of self-defense since it masks a deeper vulnerability.
According to popular perception, unresolved grief or fear is the root cause of rage, which is considered a “secondary emotion”. That may be the case, but it’s not always the case. In most cases, we feel a variety of emotions at the same moment. Some people, though, find it simpler to focus on their anger since it’s more comfortable than the other feelings they may be experiencing. For some people, it isn’t so much about hiding their emotions as it is about focusing on the things that make them angry rather than the things they are saddened by. Read more about how suppressing one’s emotions can lead to adverse effects in other parts of our lives here.
Men’s anger issues are frequently utilized to cover a variety of unpleasant emotions, such as:
Feeling Lonely
Loneliness has a negative influence on health and happiness since humans were not designed to be alone. Thoughts of negativity may resurface as emotions grow more unstable and turbulent. As a person’s feelings of resentment toward others continue to build up over time, they might be released either spontaneously or with deliberate aim.
Feeling Emasculated
Male emasculation manifests itself in the form of sexual performance anxiety or other self-perceived restrictions or shortcomings. If a guy believes that his “duties” or expectations of what it means to be a man are unmet, he may feel inferior to other men. Angry outbursts are common when a man feels “less than.”
Feeling Sad
When we express our emotions, we open ourselves up to danger. Men who exhibit melancholy in these cultures may face torture or even murder. Expressing melancholy may be frowned upon in other partnerships, when the man is expected to constantly be strong. When one has a lot to lose, expressing one’s rage in public may be the best option.
Feeling Guilt
Shame, on the other hand, is a deep-seated conviction that one is deficient, whereas guilt is a true sense of remorse for one’s actions. Since this emotion is so strong, many men are afraid to express it.
Feeling Envy
Jealousy is concerned that someone is trying to take something that belongs to you. Feelings of inadequacy can have a negative and terrifying effect on one’s life. Publicly expressing envy or shame can be dangerous as well.
Feeling Scared
Even though men experience all of the basic emotions and types of emotions that women do, socialization has made it more acceptable for men to show their rage. Fear is often considered a sign of vulnerability, while the expressing of rage outwardly is celebrated as a sign of strength. Even if men attempt to deny it, if men are unable to express their actual feelings, it immediately affects that man’s mental health. When fear becomes too much to bear, it erupts in rage.
Anger’s Impact On Men
A man’s life can be ruined if he has a problem with anger. People’s health may be harmed if the sympathetic nervous system’s fight-flight-freeze reaction is constantly triggered, putting undue strain on the body’s more fragile systems. It can affect a person’s marriage, parenting skills, friendships, and profession, all of which can lead to strained relationships and legal issues.
- Anger issues can have the following effects on men’s lives:
- Physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse and neglect are all forms of domestic violence.
- Inflicting severe injury or death on another person
- Taking your own life
- Divorce and other breakups of close personal ties
- Problems in the workplace that could lead to dismissal
- Others reacting angrily in response.
- Injuries to oneself, such as being assaulted, tortured, or killed.
- Having a reputation for being unfriendly to others
- Both your own and the property of others can be destroyed in an act of vandalism.
- The possibility of being arrested or having legal troubles
- A variety of health issues such as heart disease or high blood pressure